Basic Mom Week in Review - 03/15/15

5 Things That Actually Happened This Week and the Lessons I Learned

1. I almost burned down my house.

And then my husband mocked me by singing, "I set FI -IRE to the tray!" to the tune of Adele's, "Set Fire to the Rain."

Lesson: I should turn the burners off when I am done cooking dinner - especially if I plan to set my toddler's high chair tray on top of the stove.

2. My toddler did this to my kindergartener's school library book (Ms. Ford, if you happen to read this, please avert your eyes):

Lesson: Always buy washable markers.

3. I took my toddler to open preschool gymnastics at our rec center, and she received some instant karma.

Here she is being a mean girl, yelling at any other kid who dared approach the slide:

And here she is seconds before trying to push a boy off this wobbly-mat thing, which resulted in her falling backward off said wobbly-mat thing:

Lesson: Treat others how you want to be treated, or karma will throw you backward off a wobbly-mat thing.

4. While chatting with another mom at the mall play place, I commented that we had "such '80s names."

After she left, bits of our conversation started nagging at me, so I did some math and realized she was, in fact, born in the '90s. Oops.

Lesson: I need to stop assuming everyone I meet is about my age. Also, if Pamela from the mall play place happens to read this, I apologize - in retrospect, you do not look old enough to have been born in the '80s, but I am still wrapping my head around the fact that some people who were born in the '90s are in their 20's.

5. I went to see "Fifty Shades of Grey," and the supremely nice young man working the ticket counter asked to see my ID "because it's rated R."

Lesson: I can pass as someone born in the '90s. (Either that, or the kid selling tickets thought it would be nice to flatter some old lady).