Basic Mom Month in Review - 03/04/18
/8 Things That Actually Happened This Month and the Lessons I Learned:
1. This interaction:
4-Year-Old: Feel my abs.
Husband: [pokes 4-Year-Old's abdomen]
4-Year-Old: No! My abs in my arms!
Lesson: Apparently, my daughter thinks the words "muscles" and "abs" are interchangeable.
Joyent.com
2. My 4-year-old got to dictate her own grocery list to her teacher at preschool:
Lesson: My 4-year-old is wise enough to know that the whole household will crumble if Mommy doesn't get her coffee.
3. My kids opened their own Home Depot in the basement.
Lesson: Pretty limited selection, but the staff was adorable.
4. This interaction:
Husband: I want to go see Paul Simon. He announced that he's retiring from touring after this tour.
4-Year-Old: Who's Paul Simon?
Husband: One of the greatest musicians ever.
Me: You've heard some of his songs before.
Husband: [brings up a picture of Paul Simon on his phone]
4-Year-Old: Why is he not a girl?
Husband: Because Paul Simon is a man.
4-Year-Old: But girls can be Paul Simons!
Lesson: I don't know about that . . . Gretchen?
Buzzfeed.com
5. Upon finishing her toast, my 4-year-old proudly announced, "Look at my stack of bones!"
Lesson: So, I'll be calling bread crusts "toast bones" from now on.
6. This interaction about 20 minutes after my husband made yogurt with blueberries and cereal for my 4-year-old (upon her request):
4-Year-Old: Actually, I'm not going to eat my breakfast.
Husband: Well, maybe Mommy will eat it.
4-Year-Old [yells to Me]: Mom! Dad made you breakfast!
Lesson: My 4-year-old's natural inclination toward manipulation is slightly terrifying.
7. My 9-year-old was happy to let my 4-year-old ride her around like a horse:
Lesson: This is a small miracle considering my 9-year-old generally doesn't allow her sister to look at her the wrong way.
8. My 4-year-old knocked my Alexander Hamilton bobblehead on the floor. His head bobbles no more:
Lesson: From this point forward, I will refer to my 4-year-old as "Aaron Burr."
