Basic Mom Week in Review - 07/31/16

5 Things That Actually Happened This Week and the Lessons I Learned

1. My 2-year-old earned a time out for "the rest of the day." After a few minutes, she started screaming, "I don't want to stay here the rest of my life!"

Lesson: Two-year-olds are very dramatic.

2. This terrifying conversation with my 7-year-old while my husband was out of town:

7-Year-Old: Side vision is weird.

Me: Your peripheral vision? Like what you see out of the corner of your eyes?

7-Year-Old: Yeah. You know, like when you go in a room, and out of the side of your eye, you see a man coming at you.

Lesson: Sometimes when you think you are talking about peripheral vision, you are really talking about a scary man-ghost that lives in your house.

3. My 7-year-old got her first offer from a cable company.

Lesson: If you ignore offers from the cable company long enough, they will start targeting your underage children.

4. My 2-year-old got her hands on the Elmer's glue:

Lesson: Apparently my 2-year-old took "Glue-All" as a command.

5. This conversation after I put the kids to bed and my 2-year-old heard the sound of the nail clippers:

2-Year-Old: Why you cutting your nails?

Me: Because I'm taking care of myself.

2-Year-Old: Don't take care of yourself!

Me: Why not?

2-Year-Old: Take care of me!

Lesson: This pretty much sums up being a mom.