Basic Mom Week in Review - 08/09/15 (AKA, Basic Mom's 30th Birthday)

5 Things That Actually Happened This Week and the Lessons I Learned

1. My toddler drew with permanent marker on the cover of her coloring book, and then tried to erase it with her sister's chalkboard eraser.

Lesson: The word "permanent" means nothing to my toddler. (But, I give her an "A" for the idea.)

2. I allowed my kids to cover the butt of my pants with stickers because it was the morning after my birthday party and it kept them quiet and entertained for twenty minutes.

Lesson: This is what slightly hungover parenting looks like.

3. My toddler finger-painted her arm . . . with ranch dressing.

Lesson: If, in the distant future, there is ever a religion dedicated to ranch dressing, my daughter is sure to have been involved in its founding.

4. This conversation with my very emotional 6-year-old daughter:

6-year-old: I just want a day where I can be who I want to be.

Me: What do you mean?

6-year-old: Like, I can let the inside be the outside.

Lesson: Either my daughter is some kind of poet, or she stole that line from something she's watched recently.

5. I wore maternity shorts to my 30th birthday party (despite the fact that my youngest child is nearly 2 years old).

Lesson: Just as I suspected, maternity shorts = more room for cake (and meatballs and wine and chips and buffalo chicken dip, etc.).